Too many leaders get caught in the trap of “shoulding” themselves—constantly feeling pressure to meet external expectations instead of leading in a way that feels true to who they are. This mindset can lead to burnout, self-doubt, and a leadership style that lacks genuine impact. If you want to lead with confidence and authenticity, it’s time to break free from the “shoulds” and focus on what truly aligns with your values. Here’s how:
1. Redefine Success on Your Terms
Instead of measuring success by someone else’s standards, take a step back and define what it really means for you. What kind of leader do you want to be? What values drive your decisions? When you shift your focus from external validation to internal fulfillment, you lead with greater clarity and purpose.
2. Embrace Your Unique Leadership Style
Authentic leadership isn’t about following a prescribed formula—it’s about owning your strengths and being real with yourself and your team. Ditch the idea that you need to fit a specific mold. Instead, leverage what makes you different and lead in a way that feels natural. People respond to authenticity, not perfection.
3. Replace Self-Criticism with Self-Compassion
Every leader faces challenges, but beating yourself up over mistakes only holds you back. Instead of focusing on what you should have done, reframe setbacks as learning experiences. When you treat yourself with the same compassion you’d offer a colleague, you build resilience and confidence in your leadership.
Leading authentically isn’t about following a rulebook—it’s about showing up as your best, most genuine self. Drop the “shoulds,” trust your instincts, and watch how your leadership transforms.